Now in my early 30s, I am a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. My brother, seven years my senior, regularly abused me, from when I was around five years old through when I was twelve. So many people who know my story — especially my pastor and friends from my church — tell me that I should forgive my brother, that I can’t really heal from what he did to me until I do. I know that (especially as a Christian) I’m supposed to always forgive. But do I really have to forgive my brother for what he did for me?
What happens when you do something that you can’t get forgiveness for? My husband committed suicide two years, three months and four days ago. He needed me, and I wasn’t there for him. I pushed him away — and he couldn’t hold on. I left him at the precise moment he needed me the most. [Read more…]
I am seriously dreading this year’s holiday visits with my extended family, many of whom inexplicably voted for, and continue to support, Donald Trump. Safe to say I’m not looking forward to some of the conversations with our family’s Trumpnuts that I know are coming my way. Any tips on how I might stop myself from going ballistic when any of my relatives start bloviating about how awesome the Orange One is?
Hoping to avoid actual jail time
One of the most emotionally complex and difficult things a person can experience is taking care of an elderly parent. I recently spent time tending to my aging, widowed father, and thought I’d pass along these fifteen points, each of which I found to be significantly helpful during this phase of my own life. [Read more…]
Dear John, Lately my 9-year-old son has been asking me questions about, basically, racism — things like why people are arguing about certain Confederate statues, and what the phrase “Black Lives Matter” means. Any advice on what I might tell him about any of this?