“President Trump pees on homeless children!” the thing screeched at her. “Putin named Special Director of Donald Trump Jr.’s. senate campaign! Trump declares all media but Fox News illegal! To strike a blow for freedom, send money now to this radio station! [Read more…]
To get right to it: I want to be an artist–a great artist, a real artist, an important artist. If I were to be perfectly honest about it, I guess I’d have to admit that what I really want is to be a famously successful artist. Without boring you with the whole story of my life, let me just ask you: What would be your single best piece of advice for someone who wants to be a great artist — or, at least, the best artist they can be? THANK YOU!
Why don’t people go Christmas caroling anymore? When I was a kid, Christmas always meant a clutch of strolling neighborhood singers regularly stopping outside your house at night to joyfully belt out a holiday tune, one that always made you feel so darn good right before you cranked up the TV so you could keep watching The Mary Tyler Moore Show. [Read more…]
I was having a night out with a friend of mine who is big into New-Age spirituality. She said, “All of the world’s great faiths can be accommodated beneath the New Age umbrella.” So we started thinking about that. And in due course we were imagining how some of the world’s primary religious texts might read if translated into New Age-eze. Below is our effort to translate into New Age the Lord’s Prayer. Some might think that we’re on to something with this! Others might think that it’s amazing that we didn’t have anything better to do. But I dunno. [Read more…]
I thought I had a great relationship with my live-in girlfriend of five years, whom I’ll call Amy. I thought I’d spend the rest of my life with her. But last night she told me that she wants me to move out. She said she feels smothered and trapped by me, and that she “needs some space.” [Read more…]